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  1. One for the trolls

    Chatter
    We've hired our new Troll finder general English boxer Curtis Woodhouse turns up on the doorstep of his Twitter troll | Sport | guardian.co.uk
  2. Spring Clean

    Chatter
    It's amazing how much rubbish you accumulate, isn't it! Bought a new solid oak chest of drawers for my bedroom today, had to go to the tip with the old B&Q chipboard one so decided to have a bit of a clean out. Old two-piece Swift leathers, Akito two-piece textile suit, old curtains and a load...
  3. A rattling/buzzing/vibration type noise from front end

    Africa Twin
    Hi Guys/Gals I've recently noticed a rattling/buzzing noise coming from somewhere in the front of the bike. It only happens when I reach about 5200rpm and continues as long as I keep the revs above this. Nothing below 5200rpm. I can't pinpoint exactly where it's coming from. I suppose using the...
  4. Blonde

    Jokes
    A blonde walked into a store to buy curtains. She went up to the salesman and said, "I want those pink curtains to fit my computer screen. The salesman mentioned, "Computers don't need curtains." The blonde said, "Hellooo…. I have windows!"
  5. Translations

    Jokes
    A Women's Guide To Male English -- What's wrong? = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now? -- I'm hungry = I'm hungry -- I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy -- I'm tired = I'm tired -- What's wrong? = I don't see why you are making such a big deal out of...
  6. hell hath no fury like a woman scorned

    Jokes
    Curtain Rods She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things. On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful Dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background...
  7. constipation cure

    Jokes
    What 22 letter word beginning with M and ending with M is a great cure for constipation? MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM! ahhh thats better:(
  8. SpeedFerries Update

    Chatter
    Dear Mr Wilkinson Please find confirmation letter with regard to the cancellation of Motorcycles. Dear Customer, Please accept my deepest personal apologies for having to cancel your motorcycle booking with SpeedFerries. Unfortunately, we will have to stop carrying all kinds of...
  9. redrocket is dead !!!!

    Chatter
    pulling up to a t junction this morning and a lady in a mondeo estate swings in to the road cutting across the junction and hitting me head on its looking like my beloved astra van thats given me sterling service for the last three yrs and has NEVER LET ME DOWN !!!:cool: is going to...
  10. A hobby ...

    Jokes
    A man needs a hobby, so Enoch decides to go to the newsagent and get find one. He walks into the newsagent and picking a magazine at random leaves with the latest copy of "Tractor Monthly". As it happens this turns out to be just the thing he needed, and before long Enoch becomes quite the...
  11. Greetings from Belfast

    Africa Twin
    After lurking for a while I have taken the plunge and decided that I need another AT. The last one, a 96 model was had away one night - you can imagine by shock on opening my bedroom curtains. Anyway I posted a wanted in the right place and hopefully it will not be to long before I have...
  12. Foglamps and feeding them with juice..

    Africa Twin
    I have finaly dipped into my pocket and purchased some projector beam foglights which I intend to attach to the engine bars below the headlamp. Alls fine so far but I am unsure wether(sp)? to take a live feed from the headlights or the sidelights or just go straight back to the battery. I have...
  13. WHat women really mean

    Jokes
    You want = You want We need = I want It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now. Do what you want = You'll pay for this later. We need to talk = I need to complain Sure... go ahead = I don't want you to. I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron! You're... so manly =...
  14. Just mean..

    Jokes
    A very ugly woman walks into Wal-Mart with her two kids. The Wal-Mart Greeter asks, "Are they twins?" The ugly woman says, "No, he's 9 and she's 7. Why? Do you think they really look alike?" "No," replies the greeter, "I just couldn't believe you got laid twice...
  15. Cut off

    Jokes
    Curt and John were out cutting wood, when John accidentally cut his arm off. Curt, who was trained in first aid, remained calm and wrapped the arm in a plastic bag and then took it and John to a surgeon. The surgeon said, "You're in luck! I'm an expert at reattaching limbs! Come back in four...
  16. how to shower like a woman/man

    Jokes
    How to shower like a woman / man >How To Shower Like a Woman > >Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according >to lights and darks. > >Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. > >If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. > >Look at your womanly...
  17. North Yorks Off Road Run

    Ride Reports and Pictures
    A fine start to the day curtains open and sunshine :lol: Bike set up, chain lubed and off I go. 8 miles down the road and chain snaps :shock: what is it about meeting Fewtrees, a phone call to Rob and a trip to local bike shop sorts it. off we go again. First track turned out to be harder...
  18. snoring dog cure

    Jokes
    >A couple have a dog who has a horrible snoring problem when it sleeps. > >The wife goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman >to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he will stop snoring. > >"Yeah, right!" she says. > >A few minutes after going to bed, the dog...
  19. Crashbars- Thank you!!!

    Africa Twin
    Hey all, Just a quick tip to those of you who haven't fitted crashbars yet: I've been riding for 3 years without any accidents/falls, until the week of the disaster arrived: Storey 1- Last Sunday on my way back from church with my brother in laws girlfriend on the back, I cruising a about 40...
  20. One for valentine

    Jokes
    Pierre, Anton and Paddy are in the pub, talking about the previous nights valentine dates. Pierre says "last night I took my wife to a beautiful French restaurant, we ate fine french cuisine, drank fine french wine and when we went home I made love to her on silk sheets in our 4 poster. I made...
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