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numpty

  1. Start Ya Ba**ard

    Africa Twin
    Now that I've got your attention... My 2001 AT, which has sat untouched for 18 months, won't start unless I spray gobs of this stuff down the airbox. Once started, I can keep it running by throttle but it wont idle (stalls out). Whilst running at 1500+ rpm its a bit rough, only a bit though...
  2. Bad earth to tail light

    Dominator / FMX
    My tail light (RD08 Dommie 1999/2000 model) appears to have a bad earth, the light flickers and goes out as revs rise then comes back on again when the revs drop. Does anyone have a tech-numpty-friendly guide to finding the fault? I have checked the bulb is tight, the three connections into the...
  3. ROSPA advanced training good result, ish!

    Riding
    I have had a full on couple of days receiving one to one intense training with www.edenproridertraining.co.uk and I am mentally exhausted. It was however all worth it as I passed my ROSPA advanced course today with 81 percent, giving me a silver. Only down side is that 86 percent would have...
  4. MATHS, can somebody please explain?

    Chatter
    OK, I admit it, I'm a numpty at maths, and clearly never paid enough attention in class. My invoices are never paid into the bank in consecutive order, and sometimes they are combined, and then have 20% deducted for income tax. The problem is compounded by not getting timely CIS statements...
  5. website set up????

    Chatter
    How easy and what does it cost to set up and run a simple website?????????? Is this realistic to set up by a computer numpty like me? i have found a .org.uk address that would suit my purpose but have not registered it yet. advise welcome, DaveS are you there????????????????
  6. numpty wire question

    Africa Twin
    Might sound like a stupid question, but I'm a complete mong when it comes to wiring. I'm bodging my unobtainable starter solenoid wiring connector that always bloody melts. I need a few short lengths of wire for my bodge, going from the connectors within the destroyed block onto the 4...
  7. XL 250S wiring loom

    XL
    Hi I have 1979 XL250S. Does anyone know if the XL185S wiring loom is the same as the 250S. ? I'm looking for a complete loom as some numpty has cut most of mine away. I have a Haynes manual but None of my colours match so not much good at the moment. Any help wopuld be apprieciated. Thanks
  8. Unscheduled drop - damage to look for?

    Africa Twin
    Because I am a numpty I managed to drop my AT in Wales on Saturday (walking pace, hill). The right indicator now points up at a jaunty angle and the throttle was stuck open for a while. Cable jiggling and application of WD40 seems to have cured that, though it does still stick occasionally...
  9. Rear suspension setup

    Transalp
    I'm after some measurements of rear suspension "sag" for a standard 650 Transalp. Since I'm a numpty head and didn't take any measurements before dismantling my bike, I'm a bit stuck now for setting up my Hagon shock. What I would like to know is - 1) For the bike on its own, how much does the...
  10. RD04 (L) and SW Motech crash bars

    Africa Twin
    Help !! I'm trying to fit these and the bottom square U Bolt won't go where it should be because there's bits of bike in the way !! Has anyone got a cunning plan (Baldrick - where are you?) It needs to sit above the bottom engine mount. I have managed to get it in the right place (above the...
  11. plasma tv problem

    Chatter
    i have had a plasma tv now for about 5 years and have noticed recently the centre of the screen has become out of focus. if i try to read a page of text the outter edge is fine and clear but the centre is very blurred. i have already checked the hdmi cable connections. as i am a bit of a...
  12. SLR Electrical question from a numpty

    Dominator / FMX
    Hi you lot. Someone will know the answer to this and probably think 'what a numpty', but here goes. When I switch the ignition on for my newly aquired 'old' SLR 650, there is a clicking sound from under the rear of the seat. It's obvioulsy a relay. It clicks a few times then goes off. Sometimes...
  13. Numpty Alert!!!

    Africa Twin
    I've just been a complete :knob: and put some diesel in my bike by mistake! I was just going through the pay-at-pump business at my local Morrisons when I spotted a friend arriving at the same petrol station. He parked up on the other side of the same pump and as we chatted I picked up the wrong...
  14. Numpty drivers now think i'm a copper!

    Transalp
    Finally got my standard front mug guard arrive in the post today to replace the MX one that fell off. I bought a cheap white one off e-bay and was planning to spray it black to match the bike. But it turns out it is white with the reflective blue & Yellow Police markings on it still. So fitted...
  15. Techno Numpty triumphs at last!

    Africa Twin
    Well after a ride with my club yesterday, a few problems developed with the Twin. Informed in no uncertain terms by a "Yorkshireman", that I needed to change my brake bulb as it wasn't working. Strange, as the rear brake lighted up okay. The tripmeter decided to do the "9 fat ladies" waltz too...
  16. Numpty question about headlight wattage

    Africa Twin
    I've got an old 1990 Africa twin with the bosch bayonet (ba20d) connectors in. When looking around for some replacement bulbs I notice that there's a range of wattages available, and also some halogen ones on ebay (made by ring that I seem to remember reading somewhere were a decent make). The...
  17. Numpty

    Chatter
    My wonderful hubbie has been cleaning out the garage tonight so he empties a bucket of water down the drive just where I get my bike out. It's starting to freeze. I am so looking forward to getting the bike out in the morning, should be a good laugh slip sliding away :D
  18. Im in the numpty world of electrics

    Africa Twin
    Hi all, Is it normal (well as normal as the @ world can be) for the near side headlight to be not as bright as the right hand lamp whilst on full beam. This has been bugging me for some time now and with my extra sensitive super man like eyes is really beginning to p**s me off. Am I really...
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