[alpslapper]

... jumped out of the top floor window :shock:

The kids heard screaming and called me - went to investigate to find the guy lying sprawled out - smashed elbow and radius and I dare say a few ribs done in

I sorted him out best I could and calmed him till the ambulance arrived.

It transpires he was locked in the house by his flat mates and decided it would be a good idea to jump! from the top of the house !!!!! :shock:

One passer by stopped to see if they could assist. Only when the guy was in the back of the ambulance and on his way did the OTHER neighbours come out to see what was going on and get the gossip!!!!!!!!!

Got me thinking though - so what did you ever do that was quite patently insanely certifable but at the time seemed like such a good idea.

ONE of my many was slipping down between the platform and the train to retrieve a dropped bag - as the train started to pull out of the station. God musta wanted to keep me alive a bit longer on that day - but at the time I saw no danger in it and it seemed the most reasonable expedient thing to do !!!!

Over to you then ......

 

[Sharribee]

Went ice climbing without a rope, it didnt look too bad from the bottom it was only when I was half way up and looked down that I realised how really really stupid it was. Really glad when I got to the top

 

[barryw33]

ran across the edge of a 75ft high bridge with my mate running on the other side racing to the other end pissed out of my face. below was a road so no soft landing. I still shiver thinking about it to this day

 

[cafe650]

I had a curry from an untried Indian takeaway the night before a morning flight to the US:blob6:

 

[Sharribee]

I had a curry from an untried Indian takeaway the night before a morning flight to the US:blob6:

 

[Guest]

Worst dull moment was when I worked for Fairfield Mabey as a surveyor. Building the bridge in a trial erection (steady guys, I've heard them all ), the crane operator is trying to slide a 30 tonne girder into place, but the flanges are binding. Standing right by the offending girder, I can see exactly what's going wrong so.......







........I stick my head between the two webs (vertical part of an 'I' beam) to give him some advice He shouts abuse at me and as I reel my neck in the girders crash together!!! One more second and 30 tonne of steel would have decapitated me
To make matters worse, the crane operator was soooo pissed with me he came over and punched me out! I just stood there dumb struck at how close I'd come to ending it all.
After that I kinda figured I must have some sort of guardian angel :angel12:

 

[Chad]

..so what did you ever do that was quite patently insanely certifable but at the time seemed like such a good idea.
..

selling moby





oh and telling the wife im going to buy a KTM990ADV and thers nothing she can do about it:shock::shock::shock::shock::shock::shock: im going to be in traction for some time

 

[Wee Jack]

selling moby





oh and telling the wife im going to buy a KTM990ADV and thers nothing she can do about it:shock::shock::shock::shock::shock::shock: im going to be in traction for some time

I can see see the sign above the door

"Wee Man's Motorcycle Procurement Consultancy"
"How to convince 'er indoors , it's a great investment"

 

[alpslapper]

Worst dull moment was when I worked for Fairfield Mabey as a surveyor. Building the bridge in a trial erection (steady guys, I've heard them all ), the crane operator is trying to slide a 30 tonne girder into place, but the flanges are binding. Standing right by the offending girder, I can see exactly what's going wrong so.......







........I stick my head between the two webs (vertical part of an 'I' beam) to give him some advice He shouts abuse at me and as I reel my neck in the girders crash together!!! One more second and 30 tonne of steel would have decapitated me
To make matters worse, the crane operator was soooo pissed with me he came over and punched me out! I just stood there dumb struck at how close I'd come to ending it all.
After that I kinda figured I must have some sort of guardian angel :angel12:

:shock:

Bloody hell !

 

[1gear1brake]

At work (bike shop), bored. My Hornet was on its paddock stand, engine running, in gear to warm up the chain prior to oiling it. I oiled it, let it run for a bit then held a rag on it to wipe of the excess. Rag snagged, took my left thumb straight into the rear sprocket :thumbleft: :confused2:. Chain tightened because of the obstruction, and stopped the rear wheel dead. Turned off the engine with my free hand but couldn't get my thumb out because the bike was still in gear and I couldn't roll the wheel backwards. Shouted for help, boss came, got him to pull my clutch in so I could roll the wheel back and extricate my mangled digit. Wrapped it in the oily rag I was holding (too sqeemish to look and see the damage) and waited for the ambulance. Operation, much pain, physio, whole Summer off my bike. Still have my thumb though it doesn't really bend any more.

Sometimes, you need somebody beside you to say, "Hang on, are you sure you should be doing that?"

Dylan

 

[Phoenix]

Had a group of young people out canoeing on a canal near bradford when one of the young ones drifted between a 60' barge and the 5' high concrete canal bank. The barge was moving forward and drifting sidways into the wall at the same time. I paddled very quickly to the aid of the sticken novice canoeist hoping to put my kayak between the barge and the young person and prevent the inevitable crush by a very large very heavy barge and small fibre glass kayak and a concrete wall by using my very light fibre glass kayak. Homer simson moment Doh!! Logic would suggest that we were both going to be splattered against the wall. The the horror of all concerned including the barge crew and the other canoeists as the young person an myself disappeared between the barge and wall. Everyone heard the young person (female) scream and then the barge crashed against the wall with a very loud bang/crunch. unseen by anyone including myself until i was in the gap between wall and barge (which needed a repaint, funny what you notice when its that close beside you ) the concrete wall had a horizontal undercut at water level, a long slot in the concrete, just big enough for the two kayaks if we both lay forward with our faces on the deck of our kayaks. the side of the barge pushed us into the slot and then bang.... the barge hit the concrete wall with no sight of us. Even the barge crew didnt see where we had gone. 5 mins later the barge had been moved and out we appeared giggling. The young person is now a canoeing instructor, but hates barges.

 

[xrv_jim]

Too many incidents to recount, generally in the "I wonder what'll happen if..." catagory. Haven't got the sense I was born with me. I'll never learn.

 

[samben]

skinnydipping in liverpool docks at 2 am in a less than sober state.

 

[Chad]

At work (bike shop), bored. My Hornet was on its paddock stand, engine running, in gear to warm up the chain prior to oiling it. I oiled it, let it run for a bit then held a rag on it to wipe of the excess. Rag snagged, took my left thumb straight into the rear sprocket :thumbleft: :confused2:. Chain tightened because of the obstruction, and stopped the rear wheel dead. Turned off the engine with my free hand but couldn't get my thumb out because the bike was still in gear and I couldn't roll the wheel backwards. Shouted for help, boss came, got him to pull my clutch in so I could roll the wheel back and extricate my mangled digit. Wrapped it in the oily rag I was holding (too sqeemish to look and see the damage) and waited for the ambulance. Operation, much pain, physio, whole Summer off my bike. Still have my thumb though it doesn't really bend any more.

Sometimes, you need somebody beside you to say, "Hang on, are you sure you should be doing that?"

Dylan

ouch ouch ouch feekin ouch

 

[chronyx]

At work (bike shop), bored. My Hornet was on its paddock stand, engine running, in gear to warm up the chain prior to oiling it. I oiled it, let it run for a bit then held a rag on it to wipe of the excess. Rag snagged, took my left thumb straight into the rear sprocket :thumbleft: :confused2:. Chain tightened because of the obstruction, and stopped the rear wheel dead. Turned off the engine with my free hand but couldn't get my thumb out because the bike was still in gear and I couldn't roll the wheel backwards. Shouted for help, boss came, got him to pull my clutch in so I could roll the wheel back and extricate my mangled digit.

Dylan, are you sure you wanted to do that?

 

[Wee Jack]

At work (bike shop), bored. My Hornet was on its paddock stand, engine running, in gear to warm up the chain prior to oiling it. I oiled it, let it run for a bit then held a rag on it to wipe of the excess. Rag snagged, took my left thumb straight into the rear sprocket :thumbleft: :confused2:. Chain tightened because of the obstruction, and stopped the rear wheel dead. Turned off the engine with my free hand but couldn't get my thumb out because the bike was still in gear and I couldn't roll the wheel backwards. Shouted for help, boss came, got him to pull my clutch in so I could roll the wheel back and extricate my mangled digit. Wrapped it in the oily rag I was holding (too sqeemish to look and see the damage) and waited for the ambulance. Operation, much pain, physio, whole Summer off my bike. Still have my thumb though it doesn't really bend any more.

Sometimes, you need somebody beside you to say, "Hang on, are you sure you should be doing that?"

Dylan

I hope you checked the sprocket for wear and "hooking" while you were at it ???

But seriously though - I used to work in a machine shop in a ship's engine builders. There was some huge stuff in there and it did a lot of damage , ost - fingers, toes , arms and even one death in the nine years I worked there. Thankfully nothing serious happened to me , but had a very close one when a "blue" hot cutting from a lathe went over the top of my safety specs and got trapped between my eylid and eyebrow !! . I know what burning soft tissue smells like and the feeling of eyeball liquid heating !!! no lasting damage though

 

[Larry Biskit]

Got impaled and hung upside down on Regents Park wrought iron gate!

It was closed I was walking home with a mate, had climbed the last 3 gates but half pissed decided that I could jump/boost over the last one. The 8 inch long diamond shape headed spike , went into my calf muscle all the way til it stopped cos of the gate cross beam, and cos I was hanging it stared ripping sideways. Yelled for my mate to lift me off, and somehow with all his strength he managed it. 8 days in hospital 30 stitches and 2 operations later, kept me lower leg but had destroyed 2 main muscles, gruesome looking leg.

Still, became a bicycle courier for a couple of years in London and lots of muscle compensated and grew, leaving me with almost no weakness, just aches and cramps a bit due to shorter split muscle. Its 90% as good as the other leg now. Lucky.... but dumb. Doh!!

 

[DaveS]

Got impaled and hung upside down on Regents Park wrought iron gate!

It was closed I was walking home with a mate, had climbed the last 3 gates but half pissed decided that I could jump/boost over the last one. The 8 inch long diamond shape headed spike , went into my calf muscle all the way til it stopped cos of the gate cross beam, and cos I was hanging it stared ripping sideways. Yelled for my mate to lift me off, and somehow with all his strength he managed it. 8 days in hospital 30 stitches and 2 operations later, kept me lower leg but had destroyed 2 main muscles, gruesome looking leg.

Still, became a bicycle courier for a couple of years in London and lots of muscle compensated and grew, leaving me with almost no weakness, just aches and cramps a bit due to shorter split muscle. Its 90% as good as the other leg now. Lucky.... but dumb. Doh!!

Feck! I think that beats most stuff. :happy9:

 

[FatFergie]

I was living in a house with two musician girlies and a trainee accountant and one of them asked me if I thought the end of the lawnmower cable was ok. It wasn't, the socket on the end was loose so I, being the only one with more than a vague idea of how to use a screwdriver (which was why I was asked) decided to rewire it without checking to see if the other end was plugged in.

What do you think happened next?

 

[SteveWilko]

I was living in a house with two musician girlies and a trainee accountant and one of them asked me if I thought the end of the lawnmower cable was ok. It wasn't, the socket on the end was loose so I, being the only one with more than a vague idea of how to use a screwdriver (which was why I was asked) decided to rewire it without checking to see if the other end was plugged in.

What do you think happened next?

The ELB (Earth leakage breaker) should have popped..... but I rather think there wasnt one....